(2.5 / 5)
A barbarian horde swarms across a green-gray hillscape, their cries rending the air.
The earth is torn beneath their feet and the hooves of horses.
Sword meets sword; shield, shield.
Balls of fire envelop the unfortunate and unwary.…
A Cure For Wellness
(1.5 / 5)
A Cure For Wellness is a film I wish was better.
A psychological horror with grandiose ambitions, it stars Dane DeHaan as Lockhart, a callow young stockbroker with ice-chip eyes dispatched to retrieve his company’s CEO from a remote “wellness center” in the Swiss Alps.…
(3 / 5)
Before we see anything, before even the whirling stars of the Paramount logo form their triumphant arc above the idealized mountain peak, we hear the agonized grunts and yells of a man indulging in brutal self-abuse.
Then comes the money shot: Mark Wahlberg doing full-body sit-ups from a leg rest halfway up a twenty-foot billboard of an Atlas-like figure pumping iron.…
(3 / 5)
Denzel Washington and Mark Walhberg banter with friendly acrimony, speed around in a variety of cars, and generally blow shit up. If you like the sound of that, you’ll probably get on with 2 Guns.
Washington is winningly cool as Bobby Trench, Wahlberg likeably guileless as Michael Stigman – two law enforcement officers who end up undercover and unaware of the other’s background – the type of character types both actors have built careers around playing.…